Week 16: Life Happens... Under 200! (199.2)

It's been a little over a month since I wrote the last post in this blog. Life happens sometimes and projects like this get put to the side for a bit. In fact, life happens and weight loss plateaus for a bit. I chose my projected weight loss completion goal for next March for reasons such as this. I knew things would come up and a month would go by without any real change and that's okay. Most of our lives don't go straight up or down, there are variations along the way.

11 mile trail run on our anniversary

Over the last month, I have increased my weekly running mileage to about 25 on average. Also, I'm starting to incorporate a few days of incline walking on the treadmill since I plan on running in many mountain races in the future starting with the Gorge 50k next spring which has 6,000 feet of vertical gain over its 31 miles. Walking on the treadmill at an incline of 15, I'm only able to go at a 2.5mph pace consistently. No wonder I suck on steep hills! That's okay though, I'm getting such a kick out of knowing I can walk 1,000 feet of gain on the treadmill at anytime. Ultimately, I'd love to see my weekly elevation gain get up to 20,000 feet before my race at the Gorge. We shall see.

Post run coffee

I had lost some weight before my anniversary last weekend when I gained six pounds in two days. Megan and I kind of go full throttle: food, alcohol, staying up late, etc. You know, the usual. On a side note, I normally don't go hard on the alcohol as much as the food. I'd rather eat my calories than drink them. A doughnut instead of a beer? Um yes please! It was awesome though. We ate Indian food, pancakes, pizza, doughnuts, went to see Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes and spent the whole weekend together. 

Alex from ESMZ

 So I guess the blog is back. I think it is a good tool to hold me accountable. It's too easy to have life happen and a month goes by without remembering that I'm supposed to be losing weight. That's not to say that I haven't been active, but I haven't kept my weight loss goal as a high priority. Even though I have a vacation and a move coming up, I plan on resuming my weight loss path.  
 

Week 11: The problem with Michael Jordan... Down .6 (200.6)

Megan and JanMarie walking up the few hundred foot steep climb on our 8 mile trail run on Sunday.

When I was growing up, I had one predominant hero: Michael Jordan. He was perfectly manicured by marketing, he rarely lost and when he did, he had the perfect excuse: his dad died. That statement seems dark, but it's truly what I thought as a kid. He never would've lost if he didn't leave the NBA for a year. Being brought up in a mostly Caucasian, nice suburban area gave me many breaks above the rest of the world, but it didn't teach me two things:

This is what happens after I weigh-in on Wednesdays. They are high calorie days to keep my metabolism guessing. My calorie cycling is still working well. This is half an old-fashioned doughnut mixed with milk n' cookies ice cream. :)

1.  I never learned to persevere when I was uncomfortable. First and foremost, I know this is an arrogant and first-world country thing to bring up, so you don't have to roll your eyes at me. As a species, humans have been striving for thousands of years to be comfortable and some are still fighting for it. To have enough food. To have adequate shelter. To have filtered water. Well, I had no role in who my parents were and what country I was brought up in, so this is all I know. I never failed at anything and if I did, I was able to lie my way out of it. It's the teacher's fault! She's an idiot! I promise, my arguments were much more convincing than this, but I don't care to reenact them at this time. As soon as I'd reach an uncomfortable situation, I'd find a reason to leave. The reinforcement of these habits created the incredibly flaky creature whose words you're currently reading, but I'm starting to embrace the discomfort. Mostly this is coming as a result of reading the adventures of trail runners (Anton Krupicka, Jenn Shelton, etc.) and falling in love with one quote: "Comfort comes as a guest, lingers to be host and stays to enslave us." Gaining this weight gave me many times when I was uncomfortable and it has given me appreciation for the people who've lost 50 pounds and completely changed their lives. Maybe they're not on the covers of magazines, but they are heroes. This brings me to the second thing I never learned as a kid.

Cari and I at the aforementioned Ben and Jerry's. :)

2. I never appreciated 2nd place or 10th place for that matter. Maybe it's the media, my friends or a huge collage of things, but as a kid I never thought the person that finished in 2nd place worked as hard as the person who finished in 1st place. This is an American fallacy I've grown to uncover as I've gotten older. In America, the winner is celebrated and portrayed as the hardest worker. While this might be true in some cases, it's mostly not the norm. No amount of running in Texas as a child would've made me a better mountain runner than Kilian Jornet. The fact is, sometimes my best isn't as good as another person's best. That doesn't make me less of a person, it just means I'm not as talented as them in one thing, but most likely I'm more talented than them in some other respect. As a child I really failed to appreciate the greatness around me and I continued this up until just a few years ago when I met Ted Ricci. Ted Ricci is a trail runner in Texas who I met on a typical 10 mile Saturday trail run at Cedar Ridge Nature Preserve in Dallas. He was in incredible shape and we ran and talked for most of the run. He rarely finishes first at races, but at the age of 50ish, he runs hard and enjoys life even harder. Just like most of us, it's not about winning for him, it's about fulfillment. It's not about external motivation, it's about internal. He finds fulfillment in trail running and that's the inspiration. As this blog and experiment continue on, as a reader I encourage you to find your Ted Ricci. There's nothing wrong with admiring the elite of the elite, but I know I haven't drawn as much inspiration from them as I've drawn from my local heroes.

Sweaty selfie after a walking interval workout on Friday. The instability of the picture I think captures how I was feeling before going to the gym. It was one of those times when all I wanted to do was stay home, lie on the couch and watch television. I did the more uncomfortable thing which was to exercise and felt very accomplished afterwards.

Someone once told me to not become a public speaker until I was forty. He said you don't have enough wisdom until that point. Of course, we can't paint all of humanity with a big brush like this, but I find it true for myself. At age 34, I'm peeling away layers of marketing, technology programming and cultural imprinting to find what is true and real in the world. This, more than anything else, is my inspiration for losing this weight, maintaining a healthy weight and pursuing all that I can in life. There's nothing wrong with being overweight, but I do find it limiting when thinking about traveling to other lands, hiking up mountains and exploring many experiences in life.

The joy of good single track trail, mountain views and sunshine.

I only lost .6 pounds this week, but that's to be expected after such a huge loss last week. I will be under 200 pounds next week which is nice to think about. Yes, it's just a number, but there are certain numbers that become landmarks and living in the land of 100s will be a good refresher for my energy level and skeletal pain.
I'm including pictures this week but no exercise log or picture of my calories. There are ten weeks of calories and exercise logs previous to this which will point out my methodology, but from here on out I just want to write about life. Without the presence of certain conditions and diseases, my weight and appearance is a bi-product of how I feel about myself and what I've learned so far during my journey of life. I assume this is the case for you too. Your appearance won't change if you don't love yourself, you won't be able to climb that mountain unless you think you can and think you're worthy enough to and so on. I deserve to be happy and healthy and so do you no matter if you finish in first place or 200th.

Week 10: Education and Perseverance... Down 3.8 more pounds! That's 21.7 pounds total! (201.2)

Now that I'm in a groove, it's time to put my foot on the throat of this weight. I'm normally a very chill person but I'm extremely competitive and my competitiveness is helping a lot with this experiment. Almost every day I know what weight I want to be at the following day (which includes purposely gaining weight some days) and I don't go to sleep until I get there. Yes, that means that if I want to be 205 in the morning, I need to be 207 before I go to sleep and I don't go to sleep until I'm at that weight. People ask me a lot about what it takes to lose weight and I'd say it's nutrition education along with a fierce level of perseverance. Even a fierce level of perseverance won't help a killed metabolism from going on a starvation diet or "poverty macros" in the words of Dr. Layne Norton so that's why I think nutritional education has to be the first priority.

Starting off, the exercise was hard. I hadn't worked out seriously in months and it hurt but now that I'm feeling fairly normal again, it's time to put myself into a higher gear which I feel like I'm doing. I won my age group at a 5k again and I feel like my running performance is improving even being at this higher weight. With that being said, I can't wait to be fitter and faster.

The dorkiest pose I could make for my podium finish at the Tutu Run.

Sweaty Selfie after my stair workout. Stairs are hard. That is all. Jagged teeth are hot, right?

Jodi and Loni on our trail run. Beautiful day!

Megan and the ladies on our trail run.

Exercise Log:

Wednesday: 1.62 mile run with my NOBO running group. Over 13,000 steps.

Thursday: 3.35 mile trail run by myself. I set a PR on this particular trail which I'm happy about. Over 15,000 steps.

Friday: I did some extra walking, but it was an active rest day before the 5k. Over 12,000 steps.

Saturday: I ran a 5k with my friends. Over 14,000 steps.

Sunday: Body weight runner-specific strength training (side lying leg lifts, clams, single leg glute bridges, plank, rows and I'm sure some other stuff) for 30 minutes and 25 minutes of walking up and down stairs which was HARD. Over 12,000 steps.

Monday: 3.3 mile trail run with friends. It was a beautiful day! Over 16,000 steps.

Tuesday: 3 mile trail run by myself on a HARD trail. After my run, I cleaned our apartment. Over 19,000 steps.

I've been getting a big salad from the cafe next door every weekday for lunch and really enjoying them. It's around 600 calories and I have to eat it in two sessions because it's so big. It normally contains spinach, black beans, potatoes, corn, avocado, chicken, bacon and balsamic dressing.  

Average calories were 2,545 per day this week.

    

Week 9: Down 17.9 pounds! (205) and I signed up for a half marathon!

This has been a really good week for me. My calories have been on point and I've been incredibly calculated. I knew Mother's Day would bring some extra calories so I accounted for them, savored them and planned ahead. Therefore, my only goal on Mother's Day was not to intentionally overeat and I accomplished that. Then, I dropped my calories on Monday and Tuesday in order to compensate for the excess calories.

Running is getting easier! From Sunday, 5/1 through Saturday, 5/7 I ran 17.1 miles! My hip flexor is improving as I repeatedly stretch it. A stretch that I've been using religiously is a small variation of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mjBaLVlQWw
Super helpful!

I feel so good that I committed to running a half marathon in September with a friend of mine. I'm so excited! Also, I'm helping a friend of mine try to PR her next 5k which is this Saturday.

I'm a ham. Love running with this group!

One thing I like about running is that I always seem to be surrounded by pretty women. :)

Sweaty selfie after my nice run of solitude.

Another great run on the trails!

Exercise Log:

Wednesday: 2.46 miles running with No Boundaries 5k group. Felt good. Over 17,000 steps for the day.

Thursday: Running specific strength training which included singe leg glute bridges, body weight squats, side lying leg raises, clams, fire hydrants, rows, 30 second planks, ball leg curls and I think that's about it. :) I like breaking all of these exercises into two circuits performing each circuit three times without rest. Rep range 10-15. Over 13,000 steps for the day.

Friday: 2 mile trail run by myself. It was a self-reflective run as I listened to one of my favorite podcasts, "Tangentially Speaking." In this one, Christopher Ryan (the host) spoke about his friend (whose in the podcast) who had recently died. I love parenthesis. It was a very emotional podcast and therefore made for a self-reflective run. I love runs like this from time to time. The grass is always greener, the sun is always brighter and the flowers always have a more powerful aroma when thinking about life's brevity and what a great life I have. Here's a link to the podcast if you're interested: http://chrisryanphd.com/tangentially-speaking/   (It's #177) <- See, I used parenthesis again.  Over 12,000 steps for the day.

Saturday: 3.26 mile run in morning with NOBO in 5 to 1 minute intervals. 10:51 average pace. Felt like I had a lot more. 2.51 mile afternoon trail run with JM and Megan. 13:27 pace. Extremely comfortable pace. A total of 5.77 miles for the day! I'm so excited about this! Over 21,000 steps for the day.

Sunday: Mother's Day. Did body weight strength training same as described on Thursday. Got in 10,000 steps but that's about it.

Monday: 2.17 mile interval run with my friend Nick. It was a slower pace and felt very comfortable but felt good. Over 13,000 steps.

Tuesday: 3.35 mile run on trail. It felt great, beautiful day (70s, sunny, breezy). Over 14,000 steps for the day. 

I had this meal twice this week at the Co-op that is no less than 100 yards from my apartment. A strip of bacon covers a serving of huevos rancheros and half a biscuit with sausage gravy. Note, I pick the smallest bowl they have available to help with portion size. This bowl isn't more than 4 inches in diameter (probably less). Oh my god this is so good!

Nutrition: Again, I aim for controlled chaos and hit it on the mark again. :)

Calories went up but so did my exercise. 

I want 20 pounds total loss by next week!!! That's the goal. That would be 202.9.

Week 8: Down 15.1 pounds! (207.8) Hatebreed and weight loss?

As a great lyricist once said (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uwI1zkBNGa8),
"Perseverance
Against all opposition
Crushing all limitations
Pure strength through solitude
Discipline and determination"

The Hardrock 100. Talk about perseverance. I'd love to do this race some day. 

This week was about perseverance. I wrote a few days ago (http://brandonfitwin.blogspot.com/2016/05/day-54-anxiety-and-weight-gain.html) about the anxiety attacks I'd been having and to see the scale at a loss today is a sign of how I've learned to persevere over time. My childhood was really cushy which is a real arrogant, snotty-nosed kid thing to say, but it's true. In my hometown, we were soft. We weren't raised to overcome failure because failure was looked at as being negative. As I approached my early twenties, with nothing to really show for it, I realized this can't be the way to approach life. It still took me until a few years ago to really put my finger on it. As someone once said,
"Comfort comes as a guest,
lingers to become the host,
and stays to enslave us."

Losing this fifty pounds will require some discomfort. Running 100 miles will require some discomfort. Learning new skills will require some discomfort. These are all things I want to do. Since I'm in a quote-y mood, let me add one more:
"I'd rather be dead than average."

I don't live my life with the hope of being the most middle-class, average dude out there. I'm not wired that way. I did this experiment to see how myself and people like me deal with the obstacles that come with trying to lose a significant amount of weight and so much of it comes down to putting your head down and pushing forward despite the fact that sometimes it feels like you're pushing a wall. I'm glad I've learned to embrace pain (tattoos, running) and discomfort because it's helping me to lose the weight and to tell others that achieving a difficult goal can be done, but it's going to be ugly sometimes.   

Behind me is the trail I ran hill sprints on. It was a beautiful day!

 

Exercise Log:

Wednesday: Lots of walking and stretching. I have a tendency to take these weigh-in days off from any vigorous exercise. Over 15,000 steps for the day.

Thursday: I did 2 miles on the treadmill with no real specific plan. I did .12 intervals mixing up between light jogging and incline walking then transitioned into running and walking intervals. Sometimes it's nice to just get a workout in without too much structure. 2.1 miles in 31:37 including warm up and cool down. Over 13,000 steps for the day.

Friday: Walked a lot. Over 10,000 steps for the day.

Saturday: Walked over 13,000 steps and cleaned and rearranged the apartment.

Sunday: 1.5 mile trail run in 20 minutes. Felt good, decent pace. Walked around at the Boise Parade of Homes. Over 15,000 steps for the day.

Monday: Evening 3 mile run with NOBO training group in intervals. I think with the intervals of walking and running, the overall pace was 13:30. It felt good and I love being around those ladies and gentlemen. Over 15,000 steps for the day.

Tuesday:
- 2 mile trail run in the morning with Megan at 11:00 pace. Could've pushed it harder but our initial goal was 24 minutes and we actually slowed down once we realized we'd accomplish that with no problem. It was 50 degrees, clear with a slight breeze. PERFECT RUNNING WEATHER.
- In the evening, I did a runner-specific body weight workout with consisted of side lying leg raises, clams, single leg glute bridges, plank, stability ball leg curls, stability ball back extensions, bird dogs and body weight squats.
- Lastly, I did three hill sprints. The distance was .125 and it was elevation increase of 200 feet. I did each one in 57 seconds (7:34 pace). It felt good but I needed a 3 minute rest after each sprint.
Over 15,000 steps for the day. 

I'm going to stop posting the "approximate total exercise time" because I don't really know what it means. :)

Baked tofu and roasted red pepper hummus tacos. Mmmmm.

I ran out of kale so this is what my kale-less shake looks like. One apple, a handful of baby carrots and three stalks of celery.

Nutrition: Again, my nutrition was all over the place this week, but that's how I roll. I am eating more plant-based meals now as a way to mix things up. My calories were right about the same average as last week's. 

My calories were a bit chaotic but I still averaged my usual 2,500 average. As you can see, Sunday was really crazy, so I evened it out by dropping significantly on Monday.

Down 15, 35 to go.

Day 54: Anxiety and Weight Gain

I didn't want to post this, but I think it's important for others to see. This week has brought a lot of uncertainty for Megan and I. I don't deal well with uncertainty because I have anxiety and depression issues. Through meditation and exercise, I've learned to cope pretty well with them, but sometimes they sneak up on me like ninjas. I'm the coach who wrote the Stress Management challenge, but that doesn't mean that every day or week is perfect. I had my first (of two) real anxiety attacks this week. If you think anxiety attacks aren't real, which I did for a while, try having one yourself. I thought I was having a stroke. I went to bed with a lot on my mind, then got up frightened. Half of my body was tingling, my vision was blurred and I couldn't focus on anything. In fact, I had Megan look up signs and symptoms of a stroke and she did some tests on me to determine that I wasn't having one. I was having an anxiety attack. In fact, I'm struggling with having one right now because just writing about this makes me anxious, but I know this post is important so I'll push forward. Yes, I'm having anxiety problems while sitting at my desk next to my health coaching co-workers. It seems ironic, doesn't it? Listen, it happens to more people than you'd think. In fact, I'd wager that most of the people you perceive to be extroverts in your social circle have anxiety or depression issues. So how does this relate to my weight gain and loss experiment? I've gained weight this week. About three pounds to be exact. Now, I'm a pure endomorph so I can realistically lose this weight again before my next weigh in, but it puts in perspective that not everything is about the number on the scale. There are going to be weeks in life where more important things will come up you'll have to deal with and the scale will take a back seat. The main thing is understanding what your particular obstacles are and working to get better at overcoming them. If emotional eating and binging are real for you, know that overcoming those things is probably best done by taking small steps. Through this experiment, I'm starting to remember eating tons and tons of food as an emotional teenager but I don't do that now. Even a week riddled with two anxiety attacks doesn't mean binging on a ton of food. I have gained a little weight this week as a result of not focusing on my eating and exercise habits, but my habits are much more controlled. This, like many big changes, took time for me. Through learning breathing exercises, taking walks, writing and asking myself questions about my future self, the chaos in my life is much more controlled. It's still chaos but it's controlled chaos.

I don't know who will read this and honestly I'm really nervous about my workmates reading it, but I think someone out there needs to see this today. Whoever you are, you're not alone and the healthiest and happiest version of you involves much bigger things than the scale. We all deserve to be the best versions of ourselves and unfortunately that takes more work for some of us. Start small, practice positive habits and give yourself a break on bad days.    

Week 7: 14.7 pounds down!

I was greeted by the scale reading 208.2 this morning! I'm almost 15 pounds down at this point and am starting to feel amazing! I've noticed that I've developed an odd habit of constantly feeling my stomach because I can tell it's getting smaller. This week was filled with a lot of diversity. I went to the physical therapist to get work done on my hip flexors, my wife's birthday was on Sunday and I've committed to running a few races over the next year. With that being said, again this week I find myself all over the place. I repeatedly point out that this blog should not be viewed as a "how to lose 50 pounds" instruction manual, but instead should be viewed as a "how to stay consistent when life happens" manual. That's what all of this is about. Consistency.

Smoothie, cheese and bacon (microwaved bacon at that) for breakfast. Yummy! I don't take many pictures of what I eat, but I like to show a little of how I'm achieving weight loss success. I thrive on simplicity. Feel free to view my food diary on My Fitness Pal. My username is brandonfitwin. 

The lovely wife on her birthday. What's not in this picture is the biscuits and gravy we ate. Mmm.

Mmmmm kale. I love it in a smoothie.

Side shot of the smoothie before the blender dismantles it. From bottom to top it's one apple, a handful of baby carrots, three celery stalks and a handful of kale. 

Again, simple things to eat. Smoothie, bacon and beef. Simplicity is key to my weight loss.

 Exercise Log:

Wednesday: I cannot remember for the life of me.

Thursday: Lots of stretching. 10,000 steps.

Friday: 2.19 mile trail run by myself in 26:18 (12:01 pace). I made sure to warm up before and stretch afterwards in order to take care of my hip flexors. It felt great!

Saturday: I hiked with two different groups in the morning and had 10,000 steps by noon. In the evening, I did some strength training which consisted of 3 rounds of squat to press and back extension super sets for 1 minute each with no rest in between. Then I did a super set of rear cable flyes to ball leg curls 10 reps a piece with no rest. Lastly, I did super sets of incline walking (3.3mph/incline 10) for 2 minutes into 30 seconds of plank with no rest in between. Ended the day with over 20,000 steps. :)

Sunday: Megan's birthday. Ate a lot. :) I mean, that works my jaw muscles, so that counts right?

Monday: 1.56 run in intervals with the NOBO group. The intervals were 4 minutes running to 2 minutes walking. Average pace was 12:54, so total time was 20:08. Then I went to the gym with Megan to spot her for her bench press and I did 3 rounds of 2 minute incline walking (3.3mph/incline 10) into 10 reps of single leg bridge on my right side, then a 30 second plank. No rest in between. Finished with over 15,000 steps.

Tuesday: 3.31 mile trail run with Jan Marie and Jodi. It was a slow pace as I waited for them at trail heads, but everything felt really good. I warmed up and stretched afterwards like a good boy. Or like an aging guy who's scared of not being able to run again.Finished the day with over 16,000 steps.

Approximate Total Exercise Time:  220 minutes? 7.06 miles run this week. Yay! I'm so happy to be running again! My goal this coming week is to run 8-10 miles.

The weekend was off but everything still looked good.

Day 48: I lost 4 pounds from yesterday. Don't give up... You might surprise yourself...

After eating a lot of food on Sunday, I settled back into my weight loss comfort zone of eating yesterday. My MFP food diary said I ate 1,966 calories which felt about right. It's certainly not too much food but I didn't go into a starvation mindset either. This amount of food, coupled with a lot of walking, a little run and some quick but high intensity exercise, made for a startling scale reading this morning. 210.8. That's almost a five pound lost from yesterday morning. Do you remember what I said about how fast weight gain for me also equals fast weight loss? Well, here ya go. I'm almost a textbook endomorph. I gain and lose weight very fast. You might think that's a good thing, but actually it can be a bit difficult if you're trying to just maintain a certain weight or level of aesthetic. I always fluctuate because that's how my body is set up. Now, I think I might've been a little dehydrated because I didn't drink much after I left work, but that means I still lost two or three pounds in one day. All of this to say, I think it's important to not get down about one day. If I would've eaten crappy yesterday because of my eating habits on Sunday, then I never would've seen this scale surprise. From my experience, the people that achieve and maintain their health and fitness goals are not the ones who are perfect, they are the ones that do a good job about 80% of the time. They are the ones who don't let one day of eating too much turn into two, three and a week. Those that focus on trying to be perfect normally set themselves up for disappointment and eventually completely give up. It's not about being perfect, it's about being consistent.

My interval run with friends at the No Boundaries running group through Fleet Feet.

I do fully expect to be at a higher weight tomorrow morning due to drinking more today, but I know that I'm doing my best to achieve my weight loss goals and enjoy life. My wife's birthday only comes around once a year, and I'm going to celebrate it every year with food, drink and spending time together. 

Day 47: Celebrations and weight gain...

Yesterday was my wife's birthday, so we've been celebrating all weekend. By celebrating of course I mean eating, drinking and being merry. The being merry part has few calories but the eating and drinking can add up a bit. I got on the scale this morning at 215, 2.5 pounds over last Wednesday's weigh in. This doesn't bother me because I didn't say I wasn't going to indulge this weekend and normally fast weight gain means fast weight loss for me, but I must say that I'm glad I didn't advertise this blog as a "how-to" as far as weight loss goes. I'm giving myself a year to take this weight off because I understand there needs to be a balance for me. I have no desire to not indulge during celebrations and holidays as long as I'm making progress. If that progress ever becomes stagnant, then I'll change my actions, but that hasn't happened yet.

Bittercreek Alehouse is our favorite bar in Boise. We went there on Saturday night where I had chips, salsa and french fries. You know, basically carbs, carbs and carbs. Megan had whiskey and beer carbs. :)

I ate homemade chicken enchilada casserole on Sunday (Megan's favorite). I stole this picture from the internet because I'm dreadful at remembering to take pictures for this blog, but it did look a lot like this and was completely delicious... All 1 million calories of it.

I harp on this point in many blog posts, but it's true. You can't get upset about not meeting your expectations if you never had CLEAR expectations to begin with. I never gave myself a caloric goal this weekend therefore I can't be upset that I went overboard. Many clients of mine have a bad habit of giving themselves a hard time when they shouldn't. They'll have a celebration coming up, they'll stress about it, not make a realistic goal in relation to the celebratory time, feel horrible about their actions and then continue to eat poorly for a week. What a horrible downward spiral to fall into. I know I cannot be upset for eating more than I should because I never said how much I'd eat this weekend. Also, it doesn't make sense for two days of indulging to become a week of indulging just because I feel bad (which I don't) about those two days. Does that make sense? It seems to me that people are really hard on themselves. I'm not an in-season bodybuilder so I don't set unrealistic expectations that I know I can't reach and maintain. I have a year long weight loss goal of losing 50 pounds and I'm well on track to making that happen. It took me eight months to put this weight on, so I know it should reasonably take me about that time (or a little more) to take it off.

So, let's sum up this post. Don't be hard on yourself. Life's too short to feel bad, so make your goals realistic and really think about what you truly want out of life. For me, I'd rather indulge a bit more and worry about my food a bit less, than have this experiment overtake my life. It's just not worth it to me. Spending time with people I love and care about far outweighs having visible abs at this point in my life, but that's just me. 

Day 44: No more fast food?

After laying on the couch for no less than three hours yesterday evening, I figured it was time to stop eating junk food for a while. I shouldn't be too hard on myself because I am nursing some tender hip flexors on my left side, but come on... I'm a health coach and I spent my evening laying down watching Family Guy and playoff hockey for three hours? So much of this still comes down to expectations and having a plan. Throughout this journey I've learned that for me, a lack of structure breeds self destruction. I'm a bad balance of all in and all out which makes experiments like this tricky, but creates tons of empathy for those like me just starting their weight loss journeys. It's a bitter pill to swallow when you know you've made great progress by losing 10 pounds but you still have 40 to go. Maybe I felt like I needed to stop and rest for a few days before the next push. Losing 50 pounds feels like climbing up a steep mountain. The trail is 6 miles long with 3,500 feet of climbing and needs to broken down into little pieces. Well, I'm a fifth of the way to the top, let me stop and get my breath for a minute. Okay, now I'm ready to make it to that next goal which will be 202 pounds (or 20 total pounds lost.)   

Breakfast chorizo burrito.

Yesterday I ate a chorizo burrito for breakfast, pizza for lunch and early dinner, a brownie for a snack and half a cheeseburger and fries from McDonald's for my late dinner. After eating junk food for a few days now, I can honestly say I'm done for a while. I looked at my McDonald's food last night, ate a bit of it and threw it away (sorry to the starving kids in Africa). My mind and body are disgusted with it. While I haven't gained any weight, I haven't lost any and I feel like I'm not investing enough time and effort into my health which is translating into more day fatigue and a lack of desire to exercise. Again, all in or all out. It's a dangerous mindset, but I appear to be wired this way. I plan on going for a trail run and hike today to see how the hip flexors are holding up. I WILL warm up before hand and I WILL stretch afterwards. Hopefully my right glutes will activate more since I've been working with them every moment I can whether that's squeezing them right now as I write this blog or as I take each step up the stairs in our office building.

Pizza from Pie Hole in downtown Boise. Taste was great, but the feeling in my gut was not.

Cookie dough brownie. Again, taste was great but the feeling was blah.

Something happened yesterday that instantly created a blanket of quiet among my co-workers and myself. We found out Prince died. The great musician died at age 57. The initial rumors are that he was struggling with a bad flu, wouldn't cancel shows and obligations to recover and it progressively got worse and killed him. To some this might be sad and truly his death is sad but I don't think the method is. He went out of this world doing what he loved to do. He went out being himself and to people like me, that's inspirational. 

This is how much I ate of my McDonald's meal before throwing it away.

Most publishers or editors want there to be a "take-away" at the end of each book or post, so I'll oblige with this statement: I know who I am. I'm all in or all out. While this may not be the healthiest thing mentally, it's me. I'd rather die at 50 having lived a full life than die at 100 having lived a mediocre life. How will this translate to my eating and fitness? I'm going to be the guy at work that stretches every hour, the guy that does chin tucks while his boss is talking to him, the guy that warms up longer than everyone else, stretches longer than everyone else (well, within reason) and the guy that will lose this weight, create a fit body and go on to do amazing things. That's me. That's what I want. "I'd rather be dead than average."

Day 43: Fast Food, Physical Therapy & the Like...

Yes, I had two of these yesterday and no I don't feel bad about it. :)

Up until now my blog has been a weekly endeavor, but I have something to write about today so I thought I'd break the trend. Yesterday I went to my physical therapist to assess how bad my hip flexor injury was and luckily it wasn't anything crazy. My right glutes are not activating so my left side is taking a beating when running and exercising. Also, having an office job isn't helping my hip flexors become less tight. For the next few months, I'll need to work on activating my right side so it can take some of the work back from my left and stretch my hip flexors multiple times a day.

Great picture from PopSugar of a hip flexor stretch. I do a simpler version since my flexibility is a bit lacking.

I already stretch a lot at work and do strengthening exercises. In fact, in a given day, my co-workers probably get tired of me on the floor or working with bands for two minutes here and there, but I know it's what I need to do in order to stay healthy and achieve the goals I have for myself.

Here are some stretches I do in the office: http://www.acefitness.org/acefit/healthy-living-article/60/3458/the-3-stretches-you-should-be-doing-if-you/

Often times people talk about the work they do in the gym, on the pavement or wherever they're exercising but they don't talk about the amount of time they foam roll, perform mobility exercises and stretch. These extra things are what will keep you exercising long-term. As I'm getting older, I'm learning the exercise I do in the gym and on the trails doesn't mean shit if I'm not fully taking care of my muscle imbalances, posture, flexibility and other key factors that don't get a lot of publicity. For example, I haven't been warming up before I run lately because I'm so excited to run that I've completely forgotten everything else. If I want to continue running I have to put in quality time warming up, stretching and foam rolling. The behind-the-scenes actions are far more important than what people see on race day at a 5k, half marathon or 50k.

Here's a great, quick article about hips and hip flexors in particular: http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/flex-those-flexors-3-steps-to-powerful-hips.html

Yes, I had one of these yesterday too. It was delightful. :)

As far as nutrition goes, yesterday was "interesting". I basically ate fast food and junk food all day. I stayed within a decent calorie range, but my decisions were all over the place. I think I need to focus on eating more whole foods in order to stave away cravings, but is that realistic? I'm not sure if a strict style of eating is for me. I guess I should try it for a longer amount of time to see if the cravings really do go away, but then again there's always some party or get-together once a month where I will have cake or something homemade that will offset not having cravings, so maybe it just makes sense to understand that cravings will always be a part of my eating habits and I don't always have to indulge them. It's similar to energy levels for me. I always want a nap mid afternoon and have been this way for a long time. This hasn't changed when I've had a strict eating regiment and when I haven't, so I guess I just need to learn to deal with this and do the best I can with it. It doesn't mean I don't get work done, get in my exercise or anything else, it's just uncomfortable. Being uncomfortable is okay though. A lot of greatness comes from being uncomfortable: people run 100 miles, start up companies flourish from founders who sacrifice sleep and relationships, people fight evil dictators in war, etc. There's a quote I always think about when it comes to comfort:

All of this to say, if I'm wanting to be a great trainer, the best runner I can be for my 50k next year and lose this weight, being comfortable can't be my goal. It's more like my enemy. So, where does that leave me? It probably makes sense to go with an 80/20 rule. Eighty percent of the time I'll eat whole foods, and twenty percent I won't. Again, a lot of this experience comes down to figuring out what makes sense for me and hoping this translates for to my readers as well. There is no perfect diet and there is no perfect exercise plan. Everything has to be tailored to each of our bodies, interests, genetics and so on. In fact, a co-worker of mine found out yesterday that their body doesn't respond well to spinach, strawberries, avocados and a few other foods that most people consider "healthy". Just because it's healthy for me doesn't mean it's healthy for them. These are important lessons to learn and I continue learning them on a daily basis.

By the way, I know you're looking at the pictures of cheeseburgers and doughnuts wondering if I gained any weight yesterday and the answer is no. I walked over 15,000 steps and didn't let cravings turn into overeating. There's a big difference between the two. I can indulge without losing track of my goals.

And yes, I had a slice of this too. :)

 

Week 6: Down 10 pounds!!!

This morning the scale said, 212.6. That's 10.3 pounds of weight loss in 6 weeks! Here is my starting picture and current picture. I probably should've smiled, but it was early. Here, I'll throw in this smiley face to make up for it. :)

Starting picture at 222.9. Refer to my first blog post: http://brandonfitwin.blogspot.com/2016/03/some-ten-years-ago-i-found-myself-at.html

Perhaps I should smile or something. I mean, I did lose 10 pounds. What I can see so far is that my face is thinner and my torso seems to be carrying less weight. The separation between my pecs is more visible now and everything is just less "blobby". 

Trail running brings me more joy than any other type of exercise does. On a pretty day, there's nothing like power hiking a steep climb, bombing a downhill, jumping off boulders and having conversations with friends. Now that I'm down in weight, I can trail run again and it absolutely fills my soul with happiness. This week was a reminder in how much difference ten pounds can make. At 222 pounds, I felt awful. I feel for people my size and bigger who make the effort to run or hike in order to lose weight and change their lives because frankly, it hurt. It still hurts, but not nearly as bad.

I'm about a quarter of the way through my weight loss journey back to having a fit body and I'm starting to feel "normal" again. It's a beautiful thing. I love feeling my body become strong again. I still have a long ways to go, but I'm loving finally having some sense of my fit body back.

I try to only run in beautiful company. :)

My first trail run in a while. It felt so good! 

What's a hike without a group selfie?

Such a fun trail with trees down and beautiful patches of snow.

We're hiking in the trees!

Exercise Log: 

Wednesday: .77 mile run at park at 8:42 pace. Walked another lap at a fast pace afterwards. I'm still not keen on running a lot on concrete at this weight. Over 10,000 steps for the day.

Thursday: 3.04 mile trail run on Eagle bike trails. It was at a 14:23 pace so there was definitely some hiking, stopping to take pictures and some jogging/running. Over 10,000 steps for the day.

Friday: Home strength training with 10 pound dumbbells (All rounds with no rest).
3 rounds of 15 push presses, 10 one-arm-one-leg dumbbell rows each side, 30 second planks, 20 heel touches, 20 marching bridges
3 rounds of one arm tricep extension and single leg alternating dumbbell curls
9,000 steps for the day.

Saturday: Lots of walking and an afternoon hike. Over 14,000 steps for the day.

Sunday: AM Strength session. All exercises for time. I did as many as I could in a minute, then went on to the next exercise. No rest at all, well no scheduled rest. :) 3 Rounds total. Step up to press with 10 pound dumbbells, cable rear delt flies or face pulls, back extensions, crunches and stair lunges.
Afternoon hike: 9.33 miles, over 1,500 feet elevation climbing at Stack Rock. Slow pace, lots of stopping for bathroom and photo sessions. Over 30,000 steps for the day.

Monday: Active rest day. I tried to walk a lot. Over 14,000 steps. I think I might've pulled a hip flexor muscle by jumping back into running too early.

Tuesday: Rest day. Over 10,000 steps. Nursing some kind of hip flexor pull or tenderness from falling back in love with trail running too quickly. :) 

Approximate Total Exercise Time: 4 hours. I separate deliberate exercise from physical activity. Meaning, I don't count my walking because I feel like I should be getting in 10,000 steps no matter what. It should be what I do as an active individual.

Calories were pretty on point this week. Sunday was high, but recovering from a 9 mile hike/run will require more food.